“A Free Resource for Spiritual Awakening.”
In a hierarchical world with limited resources, to make a sacrifice for another person is perceived as being both noble and loving. This comes with the belief that the greater the sacrifice, the greater the demonstration of love. Though it is true that an act of sacrifice may be associated with a deep feeling of love, when it is understood that ‘we are all one’—with our intentions for this life coming from a common place—it is seen that no dream for this life is made to be sacrificed in order to allow for another.
All intentions are in alignment because they all birth from the will of The-One-Self. Therefore, even though making a sacrifice for someone may outwardly aid them—and they may even tell you how they needed you to do this for them—it is seen that all ideas around the need to make sacrifices arise from limited fear-based beliefs. Although this does not mean that making sacrifices for others is a mistake, it does mean that the love within your sacrifice is always counter-balanced through the reinforcement of the shadow belief in self-limitation.
To sacrifice something for another person is to sacrifice a part of your freedom to be yourself because of the way in which it entrenches our belief in the need for—and nobility of—sacrificing our dreams. This has been a meaningful part of our experience, but one that cannot persist as we collectively move into freedom-consciousness.
unconditional love emerges from freedom-consciousness, therefore it does not compromise, harm, or limit. If your action in any way makes a sacrifice of your own being then, regardless of how loving you may feel, there is a fear-based belief being expressed through that love. And, even though your sacrificial action may outwardly appear to aid someone, it has not only freed them, it has also limited them in how it has taught them that the solution to their dilemma was not something already within them, but could only be found within the sacrifice of another person (reinforcing the validity of sacrifice).
You are not loving another person if you sacrifice an aspect of your own being for them. To make a sacrifice for someone is to take away their power, their choice, and their right of creation. To make a sacrifice of yourself for another person is to live someone else’s life rather than your own. It is to play the martyr. And, no matter what the short term benefits may outwardly be, to make a sacrifice is to create a future moment in your embodied experience when you will take back that power and retrieve whatever it is you have sacrificed.
Sacrifice and Debt
Although we may feel that the sacrifices we make for others come from a place of love, it is important to be aware of the opposing motivations that can exist within any sacrifice. This is not so you can chastise or feel bad about yourself, but so you can clearly see yourself and the unconscious fears that may be operating within you.
Be aware when looking at patterns of sacrifice in your life—including relationships with those who ask you to sacrifice on their behalf—that aside from the expression of love, there is often the desire to bind two selves together through an idea of a debt being created. The desire to create a feeling of debt is the desire to translate an inner feeling of attachment into outward-circumstance. Release this idea by knowing you are not owed anything by those for whom you have sacrificed, and that you do not owe anything to those who have made sacrifices for you. Release any beliefs in the validity of debt in order to release sacrifice. Within the realization of our unity is the realization that there is no separation of self across which debt can exist—because you cannot be indebted to yourself.
There is no dream that exists for the purpose of being sacrificed. There is no need for one person to fail so another can succeed. There is no need for a system of debt in order for us to help each other or for there to be fairness. There is no need to cause other people to feel indebted to you so that you can feel loved and cared for. Have the courage and breadth of vision to see that you can love without there being any notion of sacrifice or the creation of debt.
The realization that ‘no one owes you anything’ will make you feel happier as you are no longer attached to the repayment of a debt. To choose to only act in ways that do not require the creation of a debt—because you acting from your joy rather than sacrifice—will not only elevate your personal relationships, but also clarify which are based on love, as opposed to, the ones based on ‘what we can do for each other’. By releasing the idea of self-sacrifice, you can love with a level of clarity and non-attachment that is more fulfilling for both yourself and those you love.