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What You Hate About Yourself Is A Gift.
discover Your perfection By loving Your imperfections.
“I choose to experience the perfection of my imperfections.”
To become confident and fearless is not about achieving a state of perfection. It is about accepting who you are right now—just as you are. You cannot do this through tolerating what you consider to be your imperfections. To love yourself is to love All-That-You-Are. Only when you love and accept what you have resisted about yourself will you see the full value it has brought to your life. Celebrate your imperfections to see them with clarity.
We are each eternal-consciousness in a mortal form and we are the one that chose everything about that form. This means we knowingly chose every aspect of who we are, regardless of whether we see that aspect as positive or negative. We give ourselves qualities that can be hard to accept because of how these “imperfections” shape our lives in powerful ways.
I am someone who has worked as a speaker for the last twelve years, and yet… I used to hate my voice. I was bullied at school for “sounding gay”. My class used to laugh at me whenever I had to read out loud. The act of speaking became a source of pain to me and I was petrified of speaking in front of people I didn’t know. Learning to appreciate our reasons for choosing the parts of ourselves that are most different (and difficult to accept) is a part of loving who and what we are.
After I released my first book in 2004 I was invited to speak at a popular event. It was my first significant opportunity to get attention for my writing but I would have to speak in front of several hundred people. I knew I had to do it but I was so overwhelmed by the idea of speaking that I thought about it obsessively for the next four months. I decided not to give a prepared speech because I wanted to connect with the audience by speaking from my heart.
This doubled the fear and the excitement I was feeling. I was scared I would not physically be able to speak. I don’t remember being on stage. What I do remember is that I spent the rest of the weekend feeling a level of love, acceptance and validation far beyond any I had ever received. I spoke at that event several years later in front of over 500 people and I loved every minute of it. The sound of my voice, the thing I hated most about myself, continues to be at the heart of all that I do.
imperfections are gifts that you sculpted for yourself with great love. You did this to help shape your human experience. Your birth-choice was the decision (made by your spirit) to create your mortal self.
Although your spirit determines every aspect of you, it does not determine the events that you will experience in your life—it only points to a general territory of experience.
We often resist what we are (our birth-choice) through the idea that we could or should have made a better choice. As you embrace a wider experience of consciousness, you will simultaneously embrace everything about yourself. To perceive from the level of your spirit is to step into the breadth of understanding from which it created you.
As you embrace your spirit, you will come to agree with all of its choices, including the decision to create you—just as you are—including your so-called imperfections. It has to be this way because YOU are your spirit in mortal-form. The separation between what you perceive as your spirit and what you perceive as your human self is the illusion that creates the human experience.
- What we have called perfection lies within what we have called our imperfection.
- You are perfect in your chosen imperfections.
- You are not here to be everything.
- You are here to be you.
To run from your imperfections is to run from yourself. To embrace your imperfections, as the gifts they are, is to touch your spirit. This is to stand in the timelessness before birth when you chose to create your human self. To embrace the perfection of your so-called imperfections is to touch your eternal-infinite-self / God / the Tao / source / the one eternal-consciousness / whatever else you would like to call it.
You are a divine expression of individuality from which eternal-consciousness looks out to see its reflection.
You are here to experience something unique and new.
know your perfection through knowing your imperfection.
know your imperfection by realizing that it is perfection.
Perfection through Imperfection
“I choose to experience the perfection of my chosen imperfections.”
The realization of perfection lies within the liberation of what we have judged to be our imperfections. To become confident and fearless is not about being perfect. It is about accepting who you are right now—just as you are. This is because to love yourself is to love All-That-You-Are.
You cannot love yourself by denying, minimizing, or tolerating what you consider to be your imperfections (as these are states of resistance). Only when you love and accept the qualities you have judged about yourself will you see their gifts. Learn to celebrate your imperfections to see them clearly.
We are each our spirit in human form and—in alignment with our intention for this life—we create every detail of that form. Therefore, regardless of whether you see a particular personal quality as positive or negative, you—from the level of your spirit—knowingly chose to experience yourself through it. These so-called imperfections shape our lives in powerful ways by causing us to engage with life through the characteristics that make us most different and unique. Learning to appreciate your reasons for choosing your most challenging personal aspects is a part of accepting, surrendering to, and awakening the potential of your human self.
Your imperfections make you the ideal teacher of the lessons you have learnt—and are still learning—through them. By standing in the freedom of this understanding you can release your fears, unbind your mouth, and speak the dream that flows through your heart without reservation or attachment.
To run from your imperfections is to run from yourself. To appreciate your idiosyncrasies—as the gifts they are—is to touch your spirit (because to love your imperfections is to appreciate the wisdom of your spirit’s choice to be you).
The intention of your birth was not to be everything or please anyone. You are here to be YOU, and that is to know—without doubt—that you are perfect in your chosen imperfections. You are a free expression of individuality from which your spirit looks out to see its own reflection through a human focus. To deny any aspect of your individuality is to deny how you chose—with infinite wisdom—to experience yourself as a mortal, embodiment of eternal-consciousness.
The Meaning of Imperfection
“I choose to assign meanings to reality that are empowering, inclusive, and cooperative, as these qualities best reflect my dreams of being.”
realize that the negative conception of imperfection and the state of freedom-consciousness are incompatible. Imperfection does not limit you. Imperfection is a fundamental building block of freedom and that is to say, ‘choice’. Freedom is choice. Choice is freedom. Being alive in human form is being free to choose. In each and every choice you make you are alive—including the choice to let go of control and go with the flow.
one of the central paradoxes of human existence is that you are being asked to simultaneously realize that you are both perfect and imperfect / you are infinite, yet limited / you are eternal, yet know yourself as mortal / you are God and yet human. Accept the enormity of the realization that you have created yourself to be free to be all things. The key to directly experiencing this is through the acceptance of the ways in which you believe you are imperfect—which is the side of yourself that is resisted as being ‘not ideal’.
Do not spend your life in pursuit of a mental definition of perfection because that practice is a denial that you are already perfect. The choice of your spirit to create your mortal self exactly as it is—including whatever you judge to be your imperfections—was and is perfect.
To accept an imperfection is to stop perceiving it as imperfect. Therefore, through acceptance, imperfections are seen to be the ‘perfect’ idiosyncrasies through which to experience your intention for life.
realize the perspective from which what you perceive as imperfect is only imperfect because that imperfection is the perfect reflection of your belief that you are imperfect. It will therefore be experienced as a reflection of your own self-judgment. Conversely, whatever you perceive as perfect is experienced as perfect and your interaction with it will be felt as perfection.
Even while you are trapped within limited beliefs as to what you can affect and change in your life, you are not limited in the orientation of how you choose to perceive yourself. You have the power to either empower or disempower yourself through your choice of perception. What is being spoken of here is not a life lived in perceptual delusion and does not refer to a disengagement from the perception of the consensus reality. What changes is the meaning that you assign to what you perceive.
This is to see that as much as you derive meaning from reality, you equally assign meaning to it. The choice of how you perceive yourself is a choice to live within the feeling of either a blessed or cursed life.
The writing of multiple versions of this text is explored in the sweet-spot article.